I am resting on the hump today. I did my practice this morning. It was fabulous: I got to move and sweat and enjoy my yoga and listen to my breath. This is what makes yoga great. Now...this moment. I am at peace. I picked up a book my uncle gave me years ago and read: "Timelessness. When one finally arrives at the point where schedules are forgotten, and becomes immersed in ancient rhythms, one begins to live." The book: Reflections From the North Country, by Sigurd F. Olson.
These words accurately describe my experience today. It is as if I have arrived at this point. Un-scheduling my life has led me here. It has taken me several months to do this. In March when I took a group on a yoga retreat in Costa Rica, I was unwinding for a week in the rainforest. Spending time in daily meditation and yoga, and lots of time alone, relaxing and reading, I reflected on my hectic life in Eden Prairie, Minnesota. Winter was long, the studio was getting busier and I was over scheduled. I vowed to myself to change that. What is the quality of a life lived if you are always busy?
I saw that there was still much work to accomplish to arrive there. I must first have my home be easier to maintain, my business/finances needed major overhaul in order for my daily schedule to be more spacious. I began clearing it all away. I didn't attempt this blindly, I looked at it through meditation. I meditated and asked - what is the most effective thing I can do right now that will create more space and timelessness for myself in the near future?
It didn't make logical sense to me or to many around me. I didn't care. I had a knowing that each action I took felt right and that these actions were creating the environment for richness of living, rather than creating busy-ness.
I also recognized that many thoughts that came up were fear-based thinking and recognizing those, chose to ignore them and attend to the actions that created harmony and flowing energy in my life and environment. One example was my finances. I knew I needed to find an accountant or bookkeeper, since that was one thing that was driving me crazy. It took me almost two months, I asked around and kept having this knowing that the right one was there, and would show up at the right time.
Of course she did show up. That's all taken care of now.
I am at peace and I still work strange hours. I still have more to put into order and cause to have my business work financially. My focus now, however, has changed. It has transformed. My focus is inward and upward. My answers and direction comes from a higher place, from a peaceful place.
May you also find that harmony and peace in your own life. It is there - just waiting for you. Don't worry - you may have to struggle and work very hard as you begin. Don't give in to fear. Keep your minds-eye on what you want your life to look like. If you don't know that right now, stop "doing". Just "be" - spend time resting. I do not know how long it will take. I do not know how long you will have to work hard to find it. Keep at it and cultivate your love. That is the most powerful source for you to draw from - have your actions be for love.
2 more days to go for the 40-day challenge.
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